Saturday 24 November 2012

moving on


Today, my worst nightmare came true.

Over the past week, not everything was right in my life.

It all began last weekend when after trying to climb up the stairs, my dog Jack collapsed and I screamed. I screamed because I had never seen lose energy like that before. A few days prior, we had known not all was well with him. We thought he had a cold.

The week went by, we noticed there wasn't much improvement. Yesterday was the perkiest I had seen him in a long time. He was barking and waging his tail and letting us know "I'm fine. Things are OK."

How wrong he was.

I went to sleep at about quarter to 4 last night.

I was woken up at about half 2 this afternoon.

Heart murmur, kidney and liver failure.

And that was it.

It was approximately half 1 when he was put into sleep.

He would've only had gotten worse otherwise. That wouldn't have been right. Why should he have to suffer like that?

But I am utterly heartbroken. I'm numb. Shocked. I haven't stopped crying since I woke up. My eyes are constantly filled with water. My head hurts. I haven't eaten. Nothing is the same right now. Nothing feels right at this point in time, and it won't for quite some time.

This dog was perhaps one of the most special things to have ever happened to me.

I was in 2nd year in secondary school when we adopted him. I like to mark that time we got him as a time when my life would get amazing, as prior to that I had not so good times.

And it did. It only got better and better.
I am so happy to have had you, Jack, in my life. I'll treasure every moment I had with you. And the great inspiration you gave me will never fade.

I always feared this day. Of course it was going to happen, but you never want it to.

I just... don't know what else to say...

I only wish I had given him one last hug...

One last kiss...

Jack, we love you so much.

Always.

Sunday 11 November 2012

vision


One thing I've been focusing on lately is my vision. I realised how premature a lot of things were and still are, and in the meantime I've been developing things like never before. Characters I have half planned, scenarios and locations that were just a blurred image in my head are starting to become more clear and concise.

It leaves me wondering... where and when is the best time to start Triggs' story properly? 

This question both excites and scares me. But I think... I think I'll know just when. I'll know when the moment is right. For now, the further development process is becoming more enjoyable the more I've progressed. Everything is a constant journey. Where's the fun at arriving to be honest? The fun is the journey itself...